Here we go, gang. Our last movie awards show of the year… the year being 2016 of course, but in 2017 to give people time to see the movies. You know the deal. It’s the Oscars. Let’s give it some thoughts.
4:24 — Sting … officially, and finally, looking old. And of course nominated for Best Original Song, because of course he was asked to compose a Best Original Song. Why? 1) Talent. and 2) Rule #1 — Sting is ALWAYS AVAILABLE for high profile opportunities, or to perform live.
4:45 — Octavia Spencer. Erin and I love her. She’s my age, and yet I feel she’s about 1000 times more mature and secure. I mean, if Octavia Spencer comes up to you and says, “hi, would you do something for me?” … who says no? I ask again — who says No?!
4:49 — Katy Perry in a cosmetics ad. If you know me well, you know “I break for Katy Perry.” She’s so haaauuuttt, said some guy in Boston that isn’t me. I never said that.
4:52 — The Gos Boss. Us guys need to admit it — he’s one cool cat, and we would all love to hang with him or be in his “crew.” One strike against him: He’s Canadian… but doesn’t follow hockey. … What IS that? Is that legal? Come on, Ryan Gosling — like hockey!!
4:54 — Casey Affleck … still going with the scraggly beard. Is it for his next part or something? I hope it’s for a part or something…. Oh, he answers — it IS for a part. America breathes a sigh of relief. The woman interviewing him just said “everyone is rooting for you.” hmmmmmmm. She’s obviously is straight off the boat if she believes that.
4:56 — Keith Urban and Nicole Kidman, nominated tonight for the couple with the most combined “work done.”
5:04 — Charleze Theron, vibing the “I am so much better than this, and I really don’t want to be interviewed” vibe. But in my opinion, she’s cool enough to get away with it.
General Comment — It’s so funny for me to see Michael Strahan, who used to destroy men’s bodies on the football field, towering over little artistic people asking them softball questions.
5:11 — Commercial for Shondaland Thursday Nights, with “The Catch” coming back on March 9 (joining the incredible “Scandal” and that overplayed hospital show). Erin and I love this show. Campy fun! And you know what belongs in Todd Flora’s America? … you guessed it — campy fun!
5:12 — Denzel Washington is relaxed and funny. Making jokes about Viola Davis being a “pretty good actress” and saying she’ll have a career if she “keeps working at it.” Also having cute give-and-take with his wife. This is a confident man. Question for the comments section — men, would you trade your life with Denzel’s? Oh, and in a related level of difficulty, would you accept $500 million with no strings attached?
5:21 — Mel Gibson and his daughter(? I hope) being interviewed. … #We’llNeverForget
5:24 — J.T. Photo bombs Emma Stone. Who doesn’t love J.T.? I mean, the guy was in a boy band and even guys love him.
THE ACADEMY AWARDS
5:30 — And J.T. to start the show!! …a little different to start the show with a musical number and not go right to the host? Somebody look this up.
5:36 — Jimmy Kimmel getting political, but in a very clever way by making fun of Mel Gibson. I love it.
Oh, but here we go — he and Damon. I can tell I’m going to love this …
5:39 — “Black People Save NASA, and white people save Jazz. That’s what you call progress.” … love it!
5:49 — Mahershala!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I LOVE this guy. House of Cards, Hunger Games, Hidden Figures, Luke Cage… and of course — Moonlight. Well done, sir!! And apparently, has an INCREDIBLY COOL WIFE for letting him go to the Oscars 4 days after giving birth to his child. Erin: “Even I wouldn’t ask you to stay home.” So I guess it’s cool.
5:54 — ABC really wants us to watch “When We Rise.” I know this because — 1) The Oscar Ads. 2) I watch a lot of ABC
5:56 — Kate McKinnon! (oh, and Jason Bateman). We love her so much. She made a make up (sex) joke. Brilliant! Oh, my lordy — Suicide Squad can claim an Oscar. I repeat… Suicide Squad can claim an Oscar. We’re truly on “the other side.” And these makeup artists are hysterical!
6:00 — Costume … La La Land did NOT win. What does this mean? Anything? Is this the movie’s “sacrificial loss?” Granted, I saw “Fantastic Beasts” and the costuming was fantastic.
6:08 — The Hidden Figures (S)heros! Kind of a perfect trio to deliver Best Documentary. Taraji P. looks just disheveled enough to have just had sex backstage … and I hope this happened. You know — for passion and love and all. Meanwhile, Janel Monae is Queen Elizabeth I.
6:10 — THE Katherine Johnson! That’s pretty freaking awesome.
6:25 — Jimmy Kimmel parachutes in some candy to the A list crowd… I’m a little bored!
6:28 — Arrival wins a technical award for Sound Editing! Thank God. WE LOVE THIS MOVIE.
6:45 — Mark Rylance: Very thoughtful comments, and clearly a good man. But… lousy Russian Spy. Will this be a Viola Speech for the ages? ….
6:52 — … YEP! That’s Viola Davis. She rules.
7:01 — The Salesman wins Best Foreign Language Film… this is a HUUUUGE Political victory. Listen to the speech. ….
7:09 — Ok, can I just say something about Short Film, animated or otherwise? … don’t you think these movies should replace movie trailers before movies? That way, we would all see them and be vested in who wins? OR …. don’t you think they should have their own film fests throughout the country? Like — pay $12 and get to see ALL short films over the course of a couple of hours?
??? Time??? — We LOVED Zootopia.
7:13 — Dakota Johnson is weird.
7:17 — La La Land breaks the seal and finally wins for Production Design… debatable. But I am NOT one of the haters (like Erin). I liked it.
7:19 — The tour bus people … this is going to be awesome! …
Uh, Oh — this is interesting … very “everyday people,” small “d” “democratic of Jimmy Kimmel to let these people touch stardom. Erin points out, and she’s right — that Nicole Kidman was very into hanging with the everyday tourists. That earns her a lot of “regular person” points!
In: The Blue Tux
Out: Mel Gibson (still)
7:39 — Sonny Pawar!! Jimmy Kimmel interviewing the TRUE star of “Lion,” the young man that has captured and entire world’s heart!!
7:43 — Selma Hayek … Sexy… and even sexier because of the accent? Press 1 for yes, 2 for yes, 3 for maybe. And 4 for yes.
7;48 — Live Action Short … AGAIN — these movies should be shown as Previews, along with some trailers, before any movie viewed in the theater. We must do what we can to expose the public to these films!
8:00 — Cinematography… some long-haired dude for La La Land. Now, I LIKED La La Land… but I feel like the streak has begun.
8:04 — Mean Tweets …. enough said. A lot of good sports among the actors participating.
8:15 — La La Land for Best Score … let the floodgates open. Samuel L. Jackson in a Blue Tux. “Blue Tux” by the way, has about 16 Oscars tonight.
8:16 — ScarJo — “I’m so pleased to be presenting the award for best original song.” …. NOPE. Note feeling it at all, sister.
8:20 — Jennifer Aniston introduces the “Tribute” presentation? Really? She smokes like a chimney, and could soon be ON the list … Oh, I guess it makes sense then.
8:27 — “We Bought A Zoo” bit … I love it. He and Matt Damon must REALLY love each other for the sake of comedy.
8:29 — “Ben Affleck and Guest.” Nice….
8:31 — Amen… Manchester By the Sea wins Best Original Screenplay. Now, this movie is NOT easy. But it IS brilliant and poignant and people “trying to take care of each other in the case of terrible adversity” (Ken Lonergan) SO …..
8:34 — Moonlight wins Adapted Screenplay!! Wow…. this could have implications. NOT for Moonlight winning Best Picture. But for creative scripts making it through that tell the story of Americans we don’t hear enough about!
8:51 — Oh… my … GOD. Casey Affleck wins! Casey Affleck wins! That is so crazy given the controversy around him. Oh, My GOD!! … I really loved the performance, but am not sure how I feel about this.
8:57 — Hey! The Girl from “Superbad” won Best Actress!! This is so great. Well, there’s no “Easy A” to getting there. God bless, Emma Stone!!
9:03 — Crazy Faye Dunaway and bloated ego Warren Beatty declare the best picture to be … La La Land. So – there it is, then.
9:09 … Yep. Those things. With “La La Land” as the winner!!!!
9:13 — Ok. 2000 Election? Who is the actual winner of the Academy Award?
Ok…. so I’m going to walk my dog with the hope that more clarity will present itself when I return.
I’m back — It’s MOONLIGHT!! Wow. Great movie. Didn’t think it would win. But we have to remember something — the Academy Awards use Ranked Choice Voting (something we SHOULD be using in our civic, state, and federal elections). I think there were enough folks who loved La La Land, but also enough folks that hated it (there doesn’t seem to be a middle) — so Moonlight may have wracked up a lot of 2nd and 3rd choices, whereas La La Land may have gotten a healthy number of 1st choice votes, but then dropped to a lot of 6th and 7th choice votes. … I would LOVE to see the voting statistics on this one!